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I put this page here for friends and family members of ppl who self injure.
This is things that people told me when I had depression that made it worse,so I'm putting them here so others will know what not to say.
When I had depression and I would look sad always;people would say stuff like why do you have to look so miserible all the time,you don't have nothing to be misirible about!
I totaly hated that beucase,I had a LOT of reasons to be depressed,its just that I never told them about it.That hurt when somone would say that I had nothing to be depressed about.
The best thing you can tell them if they look sad is "You seem upset is there anything I can do,would you like to talk about anything?"
If they refuse then you can always hold thier hand and just be with them.If they don't want you to do that somtimes they want to be alone,and if thats what he/she asks of you then just give them time alone(somtimes they just need time to think.)
People also said stuff like "You want to be depressed I will give you a reason to be depressed"
Well if I dident have a reason to be depressed I wouldent be!!!
And no one *wants* to be depressed.
Anyways there are also some people who have depression and don't know why they are always sad,when they see no normal explanation for it.
Some doctors call it a chemical imbalance.
In any case its still a very searious illness,I had it and my advise to people who have friends or family members with depression is to *NEVER* give up on them.Always be confident and think possitive.
I had a sucicidal friend and I know how hard it is to be strong when you are listing to them talk about sucicide.But they need you to be strong,and although its hard you have to be strong for them.
DON'T FORGET ABOUT YOUR OWN NEEDS!
Somtimes when people are trying to help others with depression they allow themselvs to get run down.This is not good to you are to the depressed person.First of all you should take time to do the things that you enjoy doing.Its important that you do, beucase if you spend all of your time in fear that the depressed person is going to do somthing to him/herself then you become overstressed,find it hard to sleep,and you get in a bad mood beucase of this.This is the last thing either of you need,so you should take time to take care of your own needs also.
I'm not saying that you should just not worry about the person,and stop caring,*not at all*
but you should take time to care for youself also.
Some of the best things to say to people with depression.
Some of the best things things to them is that you are there for them.That if they need a friend or somone to talk to that you are there for them.
Make it clear to them that you do love them and want them to fight this,beucase when you have depression you feel like no one cares about you.
You feel all alone,make shure that you let them know they are not alone,and that you care about them.
Some people are hard at words and can't say how they really feel.But it is very important that the depressed person knows that you care,so if you can not tell him/her face to face,write him/her a letter,or an e-mail,in any case be shure he/she knows you are doing this cause you mean it,not just beucase he/she is doing self injury.
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